A man met a beautiful lady, and she agreed to spend the night with him for $500. So, they spent the night together. In the morning before he left, he told the lady that he did not have any cash with him, but that he would have his secretary write a check and mail it to her, calling the payment "Apartment Rental".On the way to the office, he regretted what he had done, realizing that the whole event was not worth the price. So, he sent a check of $250 and enclosed a note:Dear Madam,Enclosed you will find a check in the amount of $250 for the rental...
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
Monday, December 1, 2008
Little Jack was 7 years old, and like other boys in his age, was rather curious. He had been hearing quite a bit about courting from other boys and he wondered what it was and how it was done.One day, he took his questions to his mother, and she became flustered. Instead of explaining things to Jack, she told him to hide behind the curtains one night and watch his elder sister and her boyfriend. Jack did, and the following morning, Jack explained everything to his mother.Sister and her boyfriend sat and talked for a while. Then, he turned off most...
When you delete your files or empty the Recycle Bin from a computer, the computer merely removes the references of the file from the file system table. Your files are still reside on the hard disk until another file is created over it. Your deleted files can still be retrieved using data recovery software or by studying the magnetic fields on the disk platter surface.To prevent your hard disk data from falling into those malicious hands before you thrown it away, you can either physically destroy the hard disk by smashing it with a hammer, or use...
A blind boy was sitting on the steps of a building with a hat besides his feet. He held up a sign that said: 'I am blind. Please help'. There were only a few coins in the hat. A man was walking by. He took a few coins from his pocket and dropped them into the hat. He then took the sign, turned it around, and wrote some words. He put the sign back so that everyone who walked by will see the new words. Soon, the hat began to fill up. A lot more people were giving money to the blind boy.That afternoon, the man who had changed the sign came to see...
Sunday, November 30, 2008
Operator: "Thank you for calling Pizza Galaxy. May I have your..."Customer: "Hello, can I order..."Operator: "Can I have your multi-purpose card number first, Sir ?"Customer: "It's eh..., hold on...889861356102049-998-45-54610."Operator: "Okay... you are... Mr Jack Ng and you are calling from 43rd Floor, Super View Apartment, RedHill Road, ...your home number is 1234 5678, your office number is 2345 6789 and your mobile number is 01234567890. Which number are you calling from now, Sir ?"Customer: "Home ! How did you get all my phone numbers ?"Operator:...
Hokkien phrases on "7 habits for successful people"Steven Covey's famous "7 habits for successful people" are nothing more than a free adaptation of very common Hokkien phrases. Hence, why pay thousands of dollars to attend talks when your grand-parents, parents, spouses and even the auntie who sweeps the floor can give you the same kind of advice Free Of Charge every day ?Habit No 1: Be Pro-ActiveKin Ka Kin Chiew (Fast leg, fast hand)Habit No 2: Sharpen the SawToh Bua Lai Lai (Make the knife sharp)Habit No 3: Begin with the End In MindOoh Tao...
有趣的分手信男生提分手Dear:想向你辭去情人的職務，任職一年多來，在崗位上我努力學習，克盡職守，對你噓寒問暖，小心翼翼，揣測你的需要，滿足你各方面需求。在感情提供你慰藉，讓你有被愛的感覺；在行動上，等待、接送、陪伴、更只是基本工作。雖不經手財務，卻要負起所有買單重責；三不五時還要送禮討你歡心。一個稱職的情人要溫柔體貼，還要心胸寬闊。聽你提及對別的男人的大方及讚賞，不可以醋勁大發。剛任職之時不知如何拿捏，犯了幾次錯誤竟敢與你鬧情緒。 幾度你想把我開除，後來在我保證不再犯的前提下，你勉強再給我觀察期。 這些時日以來，幾經思索，感謝你給我這次機會。但我確實不適任此職位，想向你申請調回朋友部門。看你對那部門同仁有說有笑，三不五時還會請他們小聚一番，有點羨慕他們：上班時間彈性，不用隨call隨到，不用接送，不用買單，不用送禮，不用面對你冷漠一面，可看到你陽光似的笑容，聽到你幽默言談。而我雖佔了情人的缺，除了責任加重卻沒任何特殊待遇；沒有甜言蜜語，沒有多一點關心，沒有禮物，沒有...決定辭去這職務，至於你是否願讓我調部門，一切尊重你的裁決...一個盡心盡力的員工敬上女生的回覆Dear:關於您轉調部門的提議，經過董事家長會開會討論，以下決議事項向您說明:因您當初面試時的職務為情人，標準與要求一開始就跟朋友不同，雖然試用期間你的表現不好差點被開除，但念在你苦苦哀求且信誓旦旦的說明你可以改進與昇任，才予以留任。情人屬於正職工作，與兼職的朋友部門不同，當然責任與工作相對也比較多，但是薪資及福利保證優於朋友部門，情人有按摩、親親、抱抱及陪同參予家庭聚會與煮宵夜的紅利與福利，還有很好的升遷管道，可以升為老公、爸爸、阿公...等，這些絕對都是朋友部門所沒有的。最後，因目前朋友部門沒有職缺，情人又是重要職務，因此在未尋獲新人或職務代理人並完成交接前，先將您轉調到備胎部門，這個部門的人員不需要每天面對老闆，應該可以暫時讓您的責任跟壓力不那麼大。等情人職務有人可以交接時，可再將您轉調到地下情人部門，當然若屆時朋友部門有缺也可轉調到朋友部門，或是您要離職也可以，當然自動離職是沒有遣散費的。謝謝您一年多來的努力...董事會成員代表敬上男人要有肉鼻头要有肉，鼻头有肉的男人既有欲也有财，衣食无忧；嘴唇要有肉，厚嘴唇的男人为人厚道，薄嘴唇的男人通常都很薄幸；下巴要有肉，下巴有肉，除了可以让你捏他下巴之外，他的晚年也会过得不错，可以照顾你；耳朵要有肉，耳大肥厚，是长寿的征相，他长寿，就可以和你厮守终身，最幸福的就是可以比你爱的人先死，他那么长寿你的愿望不难达成；脸颊要有肉，双颊凹陷的男人不是太可怕吗？肩膀要有肉，可以让你舒舒服服的把下巴搁上去；背部要有肉，可以随时背你；胸前要有肉，可以挨得住女人几拳；手掌要有肉，手掌肥厚的男人会很富有，不用女人养他；双腿要有肉，两条枯树枝一样的腿太没有安全感；最重要的是屁股要有肉，屁股大而有肉的男人最顾家，小屁股的男人多半靠不住；他那颗心，当然也要是肉造的，只有这样，他的心才容易被你打动；那么...结论：找头猪准没错...
Dear Technical Support,Last year, I upgraded Girlfriend 1.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. No mention of this phenomenon was included in the product brochure. In addition, Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other programs and launches during system initialization where it monitors all the other system activities. Applications such as PokerNight 10.3, Football 5.0, Hunting and Fishing 7.5, and Racing 3.6 no longer run, crashing the system whenever...
Thursday, November 27, 2008
It is your first time. As you lie back with your muscles tighten, you put him off for a while searching for an excuse, but he refuses to be swayed as he approaches you. He asks if you are afraid and you shake your head bravely.He has had more experience, but it is the first time his finger has found the right place. He probes deeply and you shiver; your body tenses; but he is gentle like he promised he did be.He looks deeply within your eyes and tells you to trust him - he has done this many times before. His cool smile relaxes you and you open...
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
SENTOSASpend Expensively, Nothing TO See ActuallyFAMILYFather And Mother, I Love YouThe word HELLO means:How are you ?Everything all right ?Like to hear from youLove to see you soon !Obviously, I miss you...Why does a woman wants to have a HUSBAND ?HousingUnderstandingSharingBuyingAndNeverDemandingWhy does a man wants to have a WIFE ?Washing Ironing Food Entertainm...
Monday, November 17, 2008
Air-conSet air-con temperature to 25 degree celsius. If a room has switched on the air-con, gather everybody inside there. Avoid switching on individual room air-con. Use fan instead of air-con because fan consumes less electricity energy than air-con.BulbChange all bulbs to energy-saving bulbs. Switch off the bulb when not in use. Switch on 1 bulb only unless you need to read something.ClothingBuy those clothing that need not iron.Cloth-drying machine (干洗机)Stop using the cloth-drying machine. Dry washed clothing under the sun.Hair dryerAvoid bathing...
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
On 30 September 2008 (Tuesday) at about 14:00 pm, I alighted from Jurong East MRT, took a short distant walk to Jurong East Central block 134 bus stop to board bus 176 to go to the Singapore West Coast Park.On the Left Hand Side (LHS) of bus 176 that travels along the West Coast Highway road, upon seeing the West Coast Link Remote Carpark (near to Kent Ridge Secondard School building), I rang the bus bell and alighted at B16 bus stop which is directly...
Monday, September 15, 2008
On 14 September 2008 (Sunday), I took the below Singapore parks trips starting from the Harbour Front MRT at about 11:45 am:Marang Trail -> Mount Faber Park (Faber Walk) -> Henderson Waves -> Telok Blangah Hill Park (Hilltop Walk) -> Forest Walk -> Alexandra Arch -> Horticulture Park (or HortPark) -> Flora Walk -> Canopy Walk -> Kent Ridge Park.I reached Alexandra Arch at around 13:05 pm. The whole walking journal from...
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